just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
