hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
