I want to stick my p in your. b.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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