you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
