so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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