you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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