I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
