I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
