your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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