I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
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