Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
