she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
my nose is crying tears of wow.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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