oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Randomize
