Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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