so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
