Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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