So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
