I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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