Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
