Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
