I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
