i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Randomize
