Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
