your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
