Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
