you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
