I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize