so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
