Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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