ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Randomize
