R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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