whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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