i may or may not be watching the land before time
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
