Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize