Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
