I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
