Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
smell my finger.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
this will be a night to untag.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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