If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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