Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
We need to get me chipped asap
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