i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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