Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
