After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize