Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
