we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Even my vagina gasped.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
