I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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