How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
