But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Someone stole a lamp last night.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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