I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
