You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i came on her dog
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
