How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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