so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
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