I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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