i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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